Today I’d like to share some of what I’ve noticed that helped me, and has helped other people, when they choose to Live in Discovery, examine their operating system, and think about their thinking.
Being Compassionate
When we are compassionate, we make the choice to view ourselves through the lens of kindness. It takes courage to examine the way our mind operates, because it is likely we will see patterns of thought that we might think of as unflattering, or patterns that we want to change. As you begin, it’s not uncommon to start recognizing judgmental thoughts. In fact, don’t be surprised if there’s a truck load. Much of our wonkiness originates from unnecessarily judging, so if we are in the process of shifting our patterns of mind, we don’t want to experience double-jeopardy by judging our original judgment. Our self, our cells, need the safety of compassion to view this pattern honestly. For now, we need only to look at our behavior long enough to decide how we want to think and express ourselves.
Cultivating a Sense of Humor
In my opinion, humor is one of the essentials for Live in Discovery. Let me be clear! Unlike sarcasm, humor is kind, engendering, and builds relationships. In this case, it helps you build a relationship with yourself and your truth. Let’s go back to the Two Soaps from the first podcast. When I could laugh at how my mind was controlling my choice for something that was so insignificant, that “HA-ha” opened my mind. The laughter led to the “ahh-ha” that I had some pretty silly rules in my head about how things had to be in the world. My giggles actually helped me give myself permission to begin revising my operating system.
Choosing to Notice
Everyone, of every age, can notice. Noticing is being willing to observe yourself and others, without judgment. As soon as we are talking and linking ideas, we can verbalize our observations. There is no right or wrong when you’re noticing. Because many of us have practiced judging ourselves and others, it may be a bit challenging at first to see the patterns of your thinking. Don’t judge your most excellent, masterful, highly exercised, trigger-happy judge! If it’s been there for a while, it’s going to take a while to dismantle. When you simply notice, the gift is information.
I’m talking about letting your-self be a bit disturbed by information which offers you the potential to make changes in your operating system. You allow your daily life and thought patterns to be interrupted, or disrupted, in order to give you a fresh perspective. For example: You might hear yourself say something and decide “I don’t think I want to say that anymore”. As you notice what you want to change within yourself, you will become much more aware of individuals who may become your role models. Maybe you notice someone who uses words very carefully, kindly, and with compassion. Not surprisingly, you may also observe that this person has a great sense of humor. This individual may not be in your immediate circle of friends and family. Store clerks, elders in your community, teachers, neighbors, anyone can serve as a role model.
Embracing Your Ability to Change
Rest assured that throughout your life you are capable of making the choice to change. Imagine you’re still trying to wear the favorite pants you wore when you were eight years old. If you could get them over your big toe, they might be a tight squeeze. Are there any beliefs, like your old pants, that no longer fit who you are? It’s actually freeing to realize that what has come before does not need to determine who you are now, or who you can become.
Thinking about your thinking is a private act. It is a brave act. You don’t need to invite anyone into the dressing room with you as you try on new ideas. Many initial changes, which might seem small and inconsequential at first, provide profound insights. ENJOY identifying and laughing at your wonky, knowing that once you recognize it, you can change it.
Being an Explorer
If you are approaching the world a little differently, making the decision to engage with your mind in a new way, you’re going to feel some confusion and uncertainty. It helps to know that this is a temporary state, an in-between state, that often provides fresh insight. You begin to understand how to tolerate these feelings, which won’t last long, but really do help you grow as a human being. All of this stems from “thinking about your thinking”. You allow yourself to be curious about yourself and your operating system. It’s not dangerous, it’s not going to hurt anyone, and it can make a huge difference in how you relate and create in the world. Have fun discovering more of what inspires you and brings you joy.
Understanding we are all the same in many ways—-and we all have some things that make us wonderfully unique.
Take me as a case in point. When people read the list of wonky behaviors (not always the most flattering stuff) they are amazed. How did I know? How did I amass such a collection? The answer is simple. I lived versions of it. LOTS of versions of it! That’s how I know it. When we can honor this commonality, we recognize that this is part of being human. We are all trying to figure this out. The question we often share is “How do I move beyond this wonky idea?”Simultaneously, there are parts of me that make me unique. Many of the quirks of my mind led me to question my abilities. The wiring between my mind and my body is not always a secure connection. Under pressure, many things can become challenging for me. It took me a while to figure this all out. Relying on me to connect a racquet, bat, or my hand with a ball, was not the best choice for the team. My dad, an avid tennis player, took me to play tennis, ONCE! That gave him all the information he needed. I have had to find my way around and through the quirks of who I am. This too, is a commonality of being human.
When we recognize we are all doing this “thinking about our thinking” and working with the DNA package that we got, we’re more able to join in compassionately with our fellow human beings.